Hello there *waves* I've really been neglecting da, huh?
To be honest, last year was a really bad year for me. I was having a lot of problems in uni and in my personal life, and I just couldn't handle da as well. I don't really know why.

I can't promise that I'll be around much this year either (errr...seeing as it's already halfway through...) because everything is getting busier. But we'll see.

I wanted to pose a question (even though I know I'm unlikely to get many answers, if any. I just feel like asking.)
For people who work with self-portraiture: How do you feel about being the subject of your work? Of people seeing it?

I ask because I think that's one of the things I've found hard over the past 3 years I've been (admittedly infrequently) posting here. You see, I never decided I wanted to take photographs of myself. I do it mainly because I'm trying to learn more about photography, and don't have many people around to shoot. And I'm not really confident about my skills, which makes me...reluctant to ask people to come and model for me. So I wind up taking photos of myself. I certainly don't do it because I want to be told I'm pretty. I guess there's this guilty part of me that feels as though I'm fishing for compliments by posting self portraits, even though I'd never think that of anyone else who works with self-portraiture.

Right from the start, I've been really self conscious about having images of myself on the internet, for people to see. I think it comes from the privacy/safety/omgtheinternetisadangerousplace! part of me. So many times I've wanted to delete my whole gallery (well, anything with my image in it) simply because I don't want to deal with having pictures of myself out there for people to see. But it's part of my art.

I always mean to post more of my paintings, but...It's surprising just how hard it is to photograph them *right*. So many times I can't get the photograph to capture the essence of the painting itself, and just give up. (I shouldn't. But, you know. It happens.)

So yeah...I've just been caught between wanting feedback, wanting to submit more...and wanting to delete what's already on here. So my solution: Just ignore da and pretend it doesn't exist! Haha yeah that'll work.

Anyway, this is going nowhere fast, but I thought I'd share.

X Winter.

It's about time for my semi-regular journal explaining why I'm never here. So here goes.
I have petty much no internet access at home right now, and whatever I do have goes straight on uni work, so I'm afraid DA has been bumped down the priorities list, unfortunately. I'm managing to get on here every now and then to submit, but haven't been able to keep up with many journals or submissions. So I'm very sorry that I've been missing everything!
I'm still getting a chance to browse around at everyone's work (Usually at 3am, haha) but I only have dial up and it keeps screwing up when I'm trying to log in, so most of the time I don't get a chance to comment or anything. Once again, unfortunate, because I think that one of DA's strengths is the ability to give and receive feedback. Helps us all grow, after all
As far as uni goes...It's like having three jobs, as another uni student said to me. Job one is being at uni, job two is your job to pay for uni supplies and job three is all the time you spend working on uni stuff when you're not at uni. Leaving no time for anything else.

Um, anyway, take care all

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Wow, over 7 months since I updated this thing? Whoops...

Anyway, I'm just popping in to make a quick complaint.
Well, number one, as I live in Australia, none of the bands I like really come here. And if they do, they invariably go to the east coast, and skip the entire western half of the country (Grrr, mutter, snarl).
Number two, when bands I do like actually come here, there's absolutely NO PROMOTION for them. Seriously.
I mean, even some of the massive bands. MCR, for example, I missed just because I didn't hear anything and I hadn't exactly been checking the net for concert dates every three days.

And I only found out about Fall Out Boy by chance, in one, teensy advert in the newspaper. And they'd been getting serious airplay (almost to an irritating extent) for months by then.
Although, to be fair, there were a couple of passing mentions about the concert on video hits or something...I think. By which time the tickets had been on sale for ages.

And now, both HIM and Nightwish (my most longterm, favourite bands) are both coming here, and, once again, I only found out by chance in tiny ads in magazines that aren't always widely available here. My friend who is an absolute HIM fanatic had no idea until I told her. I just wish that, for once, someone would promote these bands over here. It's ridiculous. There are people like me who have been dying for the chance to see the bands they love, who would never hear about these concerts except by chance or if they've been skulking around the net. I mean, I love HIM, but I'm not exactly surfing the net every week checking concert dates because I didn't honestly think they'd ever come here - and, mistakenly, I figured that if they did, it'd be easy to hear about. Wrong.

Really, would it kill anyone to at least decently promote bands that don't make the ARIA top 10 over here? Does Justin Timberlake really need any extra help in selling tickets? I think not.
I just hate to think that the Nightwish gig or the HIM gig might be half empty not through lack of interest in the bands, but because of lack of information. Let's hope I'm wrong and there's heaps of other longterm fans who managed to find out by chance like I did, or by being more vigilant than me and checking the net. Who knows, maybe I'm just looking in all the wrong places and the has been promotion elsewhere. But I just figure that it would be nice to give these kind of international acts some support for FINALLY coming here and give them a reason to come back. I mean, if there isn't enough interest, they'll probably just decide to stick to Europe where they can sell out stadiums, rather than playing in nightclubs here.

Okay, rant over.

Eep! I can't believe that HIM and Nightwish are finally coming here! I'm so excited! And incredibly glad that I just happened to pick up the magazines that I did

Oh, and I have to add my usual "I'm-sorry-that-I'm-never-here" part. But I really am. It's just hard, "real life" is keeping me busy at the moment. I hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year! Belated, I know. I'm sorry :S

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Member of

Heya.
Time for yet another "Winter giving excuses for as to why she's not here" journal. So here we go.
I just really, really want to apologize. I'm insanely busy, and I feel bad for not commenting on anything, or even giving many signs that I'm still alive. I am! I pretty much just log in to check that nothing urgent is going on (I actually have no idea what could happen here that would be so urgent, but meh).
Uni is insane right now. Within the past month I've had two long essays, two major projects due and my final portfolios last week, plus my Art History exam coming up. I can barely look at a computer, much less spend much time on one, and as for artwork, I'm not doing anything outside of my course requirements at the moment. I actually can't remember what I do for fun around here. *cough*
So, even though I've done a bunch of work for class, I don't know how much will end up on here. Most of it is process-type stuff, unfinished, has no particular purpose, etc etc. Other than the learning involved in doing it. But there are a few drawings and two paintings that I might upload, if I ever get time. Sigh.
So, yes. I just felt it was time to apologize again, and plus I'm sick of that animal cruelty journal because it makes me mad when I see it, and I don't have the time or energy for more stress right now.
I hope that everyone's going okay, and I'm sorry once again.

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Member of

Okay, so anyone that suffered through my last rant is familiar with the fact that I abhor animal cruelty. So today I'm extending a little on that rant. I'll keep it short, promise.
Basically, the police officers who were charged with animal cruelty after dragging a kangaroo behind a ute to move it had the charges against them dropped. The Prosecutor for Public Affairs (I think that's the correct title...) said that it "wasn't in the interests of the public to have the matter go to court"
Um, why not?
Spokespeople for the police department were full of excuses as to why the officers shouldn't be blamed, including "they were just doing their job" "they're not trained to destroy or remove animals" "they were acting in good faith" "they tried several other methods" "they were trying to protect people and property".
Am I wrong in thinking that an average human being of average intelligence will realise that dragging an animal behind a moving vehicle will hurt it? I don't think so. Any idiot knows that if you need to transport an animal, there are much better ways of doing it.
Besides, there was a wildlife ranger there helping them. Surely they could have suggested something better? Like, say, an animal tranquilizer which would enable them to move the kangaroo in a van? Or at least ON the back of the ute?
I accidentally saw some of the footage of the whole fiasco, (you know, the part where they warn you it's disturbing) and almost burst into tears. The poor kangaroo kept getting up and trying to hop along with the ute, but couldn't, even though the ute was going fairly slowly. Then it fell down and got dragged again, at which point I had to look away. Although I did hear a bystander on the tape say, "They're strangling it!"
You know, it really all comes down to responsibility. The police department doesn't want to admit that its officers did anything wrong. To be honest, I don't care if they were "trying". They should have known better, and because of their actions, the poor animal was put through a lot of pain and died. It doesn't take much intelligence to know that you just don't drag animals behind cars, and if those police really didn't know any better, like we keep being told, then do we really want people like that in charge of our public safety and upholding the law? I don't think so.
It just sickens me that no one takes things like this seriously. Just because it was an animal, it doesn't mean that you should treat it disrespectfully. I'd like to try dragging those responsible behind a ute and see how THEY like it.
Whoops, my vengeful side coming out there.

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Member of